365= O N E

All photos taken by Kelly

One year old

(amazing photos taken by Kelly)

One year ago today I went to the hospital to deliver my fourth child. You can read about that here.

I would like to say that with a fourth child I have finally become a little wiser. I tried to live every moment of this last year with this little baby to the fullest. Enjoying each stage- knowing that time races by with these little ones and that soon enough sleep would come. I tried to imprint each experience into my heart- literally drinking up each moment into my soul.

The last few weeks as I have pondered my baby turning one I have felt so many emotions. One second I am loving his little personality exploding through each new thing he learns and masters. I smile and squeeze him. I talk with him. I watch him.

Then the next second my throat tightens up, my eyes brim with tears and I feel like I can't breathe- he is growing so fast right before my eyes and there is nothing I can do to stop it. I feel an overwhelming load of responsibility and fear. Fear that I am not a good mother, that I am not doing enough, teaching enough, being a good enough example (and on and on and on).

Then ...... I tell myself to breathe. To enjoy the moment and I quickly remember that each age and stage are wonderful. Sometimes I find myself closing my eyes and finding the place in my heart where I have stored the precious memories of my babies. I feel peace, I feel little chubby cheeks on my face, I see first smiles in my mind, I hear first giggles in my ears and once again my soul is whole.

I never knew being a parent would be so hard. Watching these perfect little beings grow and gain their own ideas and thoughts. Trying to protect them and teach them. Wanting more for them then I ever had. Wanting them to some how know, I mean really KNOW how fantastic they are. Sometimes it is more than I can bare. But- this is a great learning and stretching experience for me. One I wouldn't trade for the world!

Cannon- you have blessed me beyond words. You are the sweetest baby ever! You have an energy that explodes from your little soul and drenches those around you. You make me smile when nothing else can. I love you forever! You are ONE year old today. It has been an awesome year getting to know you.

51 weeks

You were so sick with the flu this week. You threw up and not to mention that you got three new teeth! I am glad you (and I) survived!

50 weeks

49 weeks

You walk everywhere without shoes- what a little boy you are!

48 weeks

Your big sister got baptized this weekend. She is such an amazing example for you and all of us. You absolutely adore her and I hope you will always be close!

11 months old

You are 11 months old! Where has the time gone. It seems like you were just born. But- I can't remember life without you either!

Some things about you at 11 months:
*you only walk now- crawling is a thing of the past
*you can stand up from a sitting position without holding on to anything
*you have three teeth- your second top tooth is very close to coming in
*you love to eat real food- no more baby food around this place. You especially love fruit, grilled cheese, pizza and chicken nuggets
*you are doing very well with a sippy cup and we will be rid of your bottle soon
*you like milk- we will be saving so much money once you are off formula (only two cans left!)
*you love to dance- you put your arm up in the air and bounce you knees
*you are a terrible sleeper at night (boo)
*You love to be outside
*you love to wrestle with your brothers
*you give big open mouthed kisses!

47 weeks

46 weeks

You love to eat- anything but baby food! You love chicken, pizza, yogurt, ice cream. Geeze- I didn't even let Savannah try these things until she was one. You must be a fourth child or something!

Week 45

You got your third tooth this week, right on the top!

Week 44

You are walking more and more each day! Your two top front teeth are trying to come in- they are so swollen, ouch!

10 months old

It is official- you are walking all over the place now. I love to watch the determination in your eyes when you look at the place you want to walk too. You start to walk- you put your arms high up in the air for balance. When you start to teeter you can stop and regain your balance now. You have started to learn how to stand up without holding on to something too.

You love to eat real food. No baby food in this house. You love chicken, pizza and yogurt or basically anything I am eating.

You laugh all the time and never stop jabbering. I know you will be an early talker too. You remind me a lot of your older brother Cooper!

43 Weeks

This week has been so exciting! You have started walking. You are so proud of your self! You stand still and get your balance and then start taking steps really fast until you fall. You smile so big and clap for yourself. I can't believe you are walking already. The time is going by too quickly!

42 weeks

(Cannon with Mommy and Daddy at Mesa Falls in Island Park Idaho)

The last week was so busy. First- you had your first bout with the stomach flu. NO FUN! Poor little man- you threw up and and just laid on your daddy's tummy all day. I felt so sad for you. But you were a trooper and snapped out of it pretty quickly. Second- You are standing all by yourself now. You think you are big stuff and.... you even took your first step to me. I predict you will be walking before we know it. We went on a fun trip to Yellowstone and you loved it. You loved being outside and you found the bears very interesting!